I hate the feeling of caring.

He should see sense, really, he should. I'm bad news.

Is there anyway to stop him from loving me? I don't care about what I want anymore, hell, I don't even really care what happens to me anymore, my mind can continue driving me insane for the rest of my life with the confusion and everything, But I just, I can't stand the thought of hurting him.
He'd be better off without me I think. I want him to be happy, I couldn't make that happen in a squillion years.. he deserves to be happy.

-.- Anyone who reads my blog is going to think I'm just a slut who wants every guy in the world, everything I write on here basically involves loves I've noticed, but sigh, I don't know what I want and the last thing I want is to hurt another person again, even if I didn't hurt Kayle that badly, I can't stand the thought of having someone else feel that way, feel, left behind? Unloved? That everything they were told was all a lie?

I hate myself.. completely.. for every wrong I've done, every person I've hurt.. I know what your thinking, emo right? Yeah I'm used to being called that.


I've noticed lately.. I'm only depressed when I'm alone because thats when my mind can speak to me the most, but, I want to be alone I'll admit it I fucking hate thinking of everything in my life thats gone wrong whenever I'm alone, but if I'm alone I cannot hurt others, and, as time goes by they'd forget about me.
Sigh.
Running away would be a nice option right now.

Another emotional outlet. :/

Sigh, I've worked out one thing in my head, but I can't work out the other, everything about the thought just spirals around my head, There's reasons why I think that and reasons why I don't.. Even if I found the conclussion of it.. I wouldn't want it to happen, wouldn't want anything to happen.
Guess, I'm scared.